It was gone. Jumping to his feet, he looked nervously around the room. He placed it on the table when the doorbell rang. He knew it was there, but now it is gone. Shaking nervously, he eagerly retraced his steps. Nowhere along the path from his chair to the door did he find it. Damn, damn, damn. Where was it? Back and forth, he went – chair to door, door to chair. It was simply not there. He was now drenched in his own sweat. Standing by his chair, slowly turning to look through out the room, he could not find it. Rushing into the hall, he looked by the phone, still nothing. Where the hell did he put it? Going back to his chair, he over turned it to see if it may have fallen. He began searching each room separately. Nothing, nothing, nothing. The last room he entered was the bedroom. Looking on top of the dressers, they were void of anything except necessities. Next were the drawers, and the regular place he kept it. Still nothing. After stepping from the walk-in closet, he stopped. Nor is it a sin for a religious to fall in love with another. But the physical expression of that love outside of marriage is a sin. No matter how wonderful and right it seems, nor does the fact that this act is done with the greatest love, make it any less sinful.’ ‘Tell me, are you serious about leaving the Order and marrying this young man?’ ‘Yes Father, I am. I love him and I want to be his wife, to spend the rest of my life with him.’ I answered. ‘Father, I’m not asking to be forgiven for loving Zachary. I do love him and I always will. I don’t believe that my love for him is sinful. What I am sorry for and I ask to be forgiven is the breaking of my vows and for not waiting for marriage before we gave our love its physical expression.’ ‘My dear Carol, I believe you and no one could ask for a more honest request for forgiveness. I will give you absolution, but I am going to give you what will probably be one of the most difficult penances that you have ever received.’ ‘What I.
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